Marie Kondoing Things and Relationships

I had been coaxing my daughter for more than a week to organize her wardrobe which was literally on the verge of falling apart. When I realized that my repeated entreaties fell on deaf ears, I threatened her with my sole weapon, “If you do not organize it by tomorrow, as a last resort, I will have to do it for you.” The intimidation worked and she assured me that the closet will be organized before any skeletons tumble out of it.

The next morning, I went to inspect her wardrobe. Lo and behold! The cupboard was not only neatly organized but also made an impressive display of all her apparel. The t-shirts were neatly rolled and stacked up in a corner, the jeans and trousers majestically dangled from hangers and other stuff deftly piled up in baskets. I have always been aware of her intellectual faculties but was certainly awestruck by her organizing abilities. It was then that she explained to me the concept of ‘KonMari’– a philosophical approach to declutter and organize things– developed by a Japanese organizing consultant, author, and TV show host, Marie Kondo.

Marie Kondo’s method involves a six-method approach to tidying up things starting with the basic step of committing to oneself. Once you decide to tidy things up, you will embark upon the journey of devising an ideal lifestyle for yourself which will be attained by discarding the unwarranted and retaining only those that ‘speak to your heart’. The approach encourages you to discard the items that no longer serve a purpose or spark joy in your life. Before discarding things, Marie suggests, sincerely thank them for having served their purpose. Finally, retain and organize only those items which can still serve some purpose or truly spark joy in your life. She also advises following orders while organizing– tidy by category, not location. Begin with clothes followed by books, papers, miscellaneous items, and finally sentimental items.

Thoroughly impressed with this new concept, I sat down to read more about this revolutionary approach. Within minutes of my online surfing, I was redirected to a couple of online dating sites that professed the idea of dating following Marie Kondo’s approach. Some of the sites claimed, “If your partner doesn’t spark joy in your life, it’s time to discard him/her!” I snapped my laptop shut, aghast at the preposterous idea but not before I had deleted the history of the recently visited sites. ‘What if’ apprehensions engulfed my mind like bushfire, one after the other. What if my partner has already visited these sites? What if my partner decides to follow the Marie Kondo approach? What if my partner decides to review our relationship on the assumption whether I spark joy in his life or not?

The trepidations of my heart finally settled down as I discerned no significant change in my partner’s behavior towards me in the following days. However, it did trigger me to think if relationships were as expendable as things and items in one’s life and if human beings could be dispensed off from one’s life when they fail to spark joy. I wonder if I belong to a pre-historic era where relationships were considered sacred and the golden rule was, “Do not break up. Fix the problem.”